My Life as a Computer Literate

My Life as a Computer Literate


You might say becoming a computer literate person is a gift. But, there's so much thing you don't know about it. Just like spiderman's famous line Great power comes with great responsibility.

Apparently, becoming one doesn't always end up so well because people expect you to help them at any cost (or mostly no cost at all). Helping them doesn't give you that much positive credits, and not helping them gives you a ton of negative credits. So in an effort to make myself the good guy, I help them. So here's my list of 15 funny personal encounters with these people.

1. Why don't you google it yourself; I'll probably do the same thing anyway. ?
people are asking questions like they assume I know everything about computers; what's the key combination for enye?

2. Stop stalking your ex, you idiot! Leave the feces behind! ?
people asking me weird questions like how to hack facebook accounts? like hey, if it was that easy there would be no Facebook.

3. Did I mention I also do technical support via email? ?
people asking me questions like how to make a website? like seriously? it took me decades to learn such and you expect me to teach you in a facebook chat? like hell, you'll freeze.

4. I'm not your slave, ya know. WannaCry? ?
people asking me to fix their computer like remove the virus. Like yow, I'm a programmer, not a PC mechanic.

5. 我不会说中文 ❗
people asking me to program in an unfamiliar language. And I was like dude, I don't speak Chinese.

6. Like did you raise me to become a criminal? The kind of news that ruins my day. ?
I hate it when my parents hear hacking news in the television and look at me like it was all my fault.

7. Do super mario bros count? ?
I hate it when someone asks me what computer games do you play? Uhm, I don't play computer games, but I pursue to make one.

8. They are faithful to me. ✨
it makes me laugh when I hear people saying programmers always have problems with a semicolon; I honestly don't have relationship problems with a semicolon.

9. Watch me become rich! ?
I hate it when my parents call my programming hobby as a poison to my life. Like hey, I do get income from this.

10. Task relay? I hate that game. ??
I hate it when people ask something only for me to google it myself. Like hey, how do I get paid for doing such a thing?

11. Nice invention, but not much of a use for me. ?
I hate it when I correct autocorrect more than autocorrect corrects me. Like how do I disable this incredibly annoying feat of technology?

12. Watch that thing become a datacenter! ?
I hate it when my parents force me to shutdown my computer when they see me not using it. Apparently, they don't understand the concept of server-based computing. Perhaps I could also turn off the tv if they're only listening to it.

13. I wish this one's not true. ?
It startled me when someone is watching my screen while I'm coding. Like hey, please don't call the police, I don't do cyber attacks.

14. Such a beautiful carabao. ?
I hate it when you respond ahhhhhh when you hear me saying something you barely understand. Like hey, stop moaning you hairless carabao.

15. Apparently, some people are expert in this field. ?
I hate it when you drift the topic from all about computers to all about your love-life. Like hey, why don't we multi-task this conversation and have both at the same time?